That Monkey Movie
Thursday, December 29, 2005
The Mrs. and I checked out the newest theater in town this week. We decided we were in the mood to watch something with giant gorillas in it, but sadly King Kong's single giant gorilla was all that was available.

I enjoyed some of the movie. I certainly recommend if you plan on seeing it at all, you see it in a theater environment. 'King Kong' demands to be seen with the volume cranked up just short of painful and on a screen the size of the film's starring primate.

Now, for the things I did not like about 'King Kong' (minor spoilers ahead):
  1. The first 1/3rd of the movie in which no one was stabbed, crushed, or eaten. (snore.)
  2. The uncircumcised worms. (You know exactly what I'm talking about if you've seen it.)
  3. Jack Driscoll, a supposed script-writer, fights everything and everyone in the movie. He punches dinosaurs, kicks giant insects, karate chops a platoon of US soldiers, swings all over the jungle Tarzan-style with one arm and a woman hanging onto him, and even single-handedly wrestles King Kong. (He wins by putting Kong in a sleeper hold.)
  4. The makeout scene between Kong and Ann. No one wants to see a woman covered in that much gorilla saliva.
  5. The dog. (Enough said.)
  6. The ending scene when they calm King Kong by giving him a very large kitten to play with. (Come on, we've all read "Koko's Kitten". Don't try to pass this off as original.)
  7. The ending line. It started with "Nay" for crying out loud.
Again, it's worth seeing, but don't tell me I didn't warn you about the worms.
Business is Good
Sunday, December 18, 2005
I noticed a banner hanging on the outside of a Wendy's, a fast-food hamburger restaurant for my readers in Uzbekistan, that read "Business is Good - Now Hiring".

That's a reassuring thing to read if you do aspire to work at Wendy's - business is good, the restaurant is seeing profits, a job there should be secure.

However, I began to imagine hanging that sign outside other businesses.

Can you imagine the public outcry if that banner was hanging outside an oil refinery? Why aren't funeral homes that proud of their economic success?

Then again, it may have more to do with the type of business that is willing to hang a banner on the outside of its building.
A Christmas Essay
Sunday, December 11, 2005
Christmas is a wonderful time of year. You really begin to feel something stirring inside you when you hear that first Christmas song in November and realize that you will likely MICROSOFT XBOX 360 hear it and your other Christmas favorites for the next 45 days in a row.

Stores really show their holiday cheer by LEAPSTER MULTIMEDIA LEARNING PROGRAM pulling out the giant snow flakes, inflatable snow globes, and dancing Santas, as well. I know I MOTOROLA RAZR V3 never get tired of that dancing fat man. Rock on Santa Claus! Just don't keep the elves up too late!

The best part of Christmas is the way IPOD NANO people light up with a festive glow as they SONY CYBER SHOT DSC-N1 spend time with hundreds of strangers waiting in line for that unique and special gift. I'm always surprised these gatherings NIKE SASQUATCH 460 TI DRIVER don't spontaneously break out into Christmas carols!

It's about time I POLK XM RADIO RECEIVER added some more chestnuts to the fire, so until next time, save some eggnog THE SIMS COMPLETE COLLECTION FOR PC for me!


Western Culture
Wax Poetic
Monday, December 05, 2005
Leaves flitter against the window,
struggling against an invisible constraint
to enter a world of Muchacos and bean burritos.

The blades of grass dance their last dance;
Knowing they will wither and die soon.
The blades of shredded lettuce lie motionless
In their shallow grave of crisp tortilla and cheese.

Outside the bitter December wind waits for me.
I am inside.
and dipping things in queso.