Bueno Paja
Saturday, October 22, 2005
I got hungry last night at about 10:00 PM and didn't feel like a bowl of Beanie Weenies or soup, so I decided to head up to the local authentic Mexican restaurant: Taco Bueno. I stopped and placed my order at the large menu of shining tastiness, then obediently pulled up to the window. Typically, the person standing behind the hinging glass window is filling my drink or taking someone else's order or waiting to tell me the price in person so I can pay. Not this night.
I'm digging through my wallet for money and she opens the window. She then smiles and asks, "Do you like skeletons?"

This is a bizarre question to be asked. I think I can confidently state that I've ever been asked it before by anyone else. I attempted later to imagine scenarios where this question may be appropriate. Here we go, in no certain order:

Acceptable Situations in Which to Be Asked the Question, "Do you like skeletons?"
  1. You have a skeleton tattoo.
  2. You are a Grateful Dead fan and own the album "Skeletons From the Closet" and a friend is browsing your collection.
  3. You are in an appropriate education program, ie. medicine, anthropology.
  4. You tell someone that Paris Hilton would be attractive if she lost some weight.
Notice I did not include, "You have just pulled up to the drive-through window at a fast food restaurant" in that list. Now, I really messed up my chance at a witty retort. I weakly answered, "They're not my favorite." Not sure what that means exactly. I know it does mean that I'm not a skeleton-fanatic like all of those crazy skeleton-loving people out there. The question and answer should have been:
Weird Drive-Through Lady: "Do you like skeletons?"
Funnier Version of Me: "Well, I really like mine."
She informs me that they are having a promotion at Taco Bueno: every time someone purchases the far-too-large drink, they get a fun straw with a halloween-type character on it. Seeing that skeletons are "not my favorite", she asks me if I'd rather have any others and rattled off the possible options that I have forgotten. Likely wolfmen and vampires. I tried to show an obvious apathy towards my selection and replied, "I don't know... why don't you surprise me?"

Oh no! No surprising on a monumental choice like this! Weird Drive-Through Lady will not let me have my food until I choose a straw. She asks me my favorite color next.


"We don't have blue."

At this point, I'm really just wanting her to take my money. Oh no, we have a straw to pick out.

"We have green, yellow, red..."

"Green is fine."

So I get the ghost straw, which actually looks more like a slug than a ghost. I couldn't pinpoint a face on the thing. So I get my food now, right? Nope.

"If you want any of the other straws, you can buy them for $0.28 and collect them all."

I didn't think I'd shown enough interest in the straws up to that point to warrant a bartering session for more of them. Needless to say, her sales pitch fell on deaf ears. Rejected and finally bored with her captive, she did finally give me food.

I drove back home, unwrapped the delicious burritos, and scraped the tomatos off with a flourescent green slug watching me.


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