Canis lupus familiaris calefacio

People that live in colder climates and own large dogs should train their dogs from an early age to sleep at the foot of their bed. That way, if their feet are cold, they can just slip them under the dog.

I developed this amazing idea while lying in bed waiting for my feet to dethaw while a furry bundle of evil heated my shoulder. My shoulders typically don't need heating. Unfortunately he is far too small to place my feet under and far too stubborn to sleep where I instruct.

I guess what I'm saying is this: Don't buy an evil Yorkshire Terrier if you intend to implement my foot-warming technique.